


Miserable and Terrible People

by PurpleCadet



Category: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-01
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-10-13 16:13:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10517280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PurpleCadet/pseuds/PurpleCadet
Summary: An brief addendum to 'Will Scarsdale Like Josh’s Shayna Punim?', because Greg totally would have made fun of everybody at the Bar Mitzvah with Rebecca.





	

She should be thrilled. After chasing Josh for the better part of a year, Rebecca finally has him exactly where she wanted him. She thought she’d pave over her crappy Scarsdale memories with him. Her misery of a mother would be almost tolerable with Josh by her side, Audra Levine wouldn’t faze her, and she’d stop feeling so lonely and inadequate in her home town. 

The thing is, Josh fits in so seamlessly with everybody – happy and easy going – he’s perfect in that way. Rebecca has never had that. She’s not wired that way. For a quiet, bitter moment, she considers the fact that Josh has probably never been called _weird_ a day in his life. 

She casts a glance in Josh’s direction. He’s still bonding with Audra’s husband – Mr Finished Quick, Rotten Lay – busting out his hip hop moves on the dance floor in front of her extended family. Rebecca almost rolls her eyes at the display before she catches herself, feeling ashamed. 

She knows what she’s doing – resenting Josh for being able to make the best out of any situation. Happiness has always come so easily to him. Rebecca’s had to work for it her entire life.

_But I think what I wanted was for you and I to just sit in a corner and laugh about how miserable and terrible everyone is._

Greg would have done that for her.

The thought invades her mind, surprising her, before she actively pushes it away. 

“That’s not fair to Josh,” she murmurs aloud, because nobody is paying her any mind as she sulks in the corner, clutching her champagne flute like a lifeline. 

It doesn’t serve her well to compare the two men, they’re completely different breeds. But okay, she’s going to do it anyway, so she may as well draw the thought out a little more.

Josh thrives in a crowd, a party, any group setting, really. He has that inherent ability to connect with all kinds of people. He’s charming and sweet and never has to humour them. Greg, on the other hand, always seemed annoyed with the human race in general, and Rebecca in particular. _But if he was here, he’d be sulking in this corner with you, making snarky comments in your ear just to make you laugh._

God, she despises her inner monologue sometimes. 

Rebecca pulls her phone out of her bra and begins scrolling through her contacts. Her thumb hovers over Greg’s name. This is stupid. They haven’t spoken since he abandoned her ( _yes, abandoned_ ) at the airport. 

Rebecca scrolls up through their previous texts, skimming past her frantic messages from months ago when she’d been trying to hunt him down so she could spill the beans about her and Josh.

And okay, it’s not exactly the correspondence of two star-crossed lovers, mostly there’s just a ton of emojis (from her, because Greg would never dare use them) and a lot of logistical planning for afternoon sex romps during their sex cocoon phase. 

Her breath catches in her throat when her screen darts back down to the most recent message as three texting dots appear. She stares at them for several seconds before they disappear completely. Her thumbs move at warp speed.

**What were you going to say?**

Rebecca drops her phone like it’s on fire. _Well, that was only remotely creepy,_ she reasons.

Josh chooses that moment to join her on the steps, a big, goofy smile on his face. 

“Babe, you should come dance with us, you’re totally missing out.”

Josh clasps her hand, getting ready to lead her onto the dance floor, and she wants to muster up some enthusiasm for him, but she doesn’t have it in her to pretend like she’s having a good time. 

“It’s okay, you enjoy. I’m good here.”

She smiles widely, then kisses him firmly on the lips, quashing any protest. Josh doesn’t look entirely convinced but her leaves her be, returning to the hole he’d been wearing on the dance floor.

Rebecca feels her phone vibrate next to her.

Greg parrots her words right back to her, **What were you going to say?**

She waits an appropriate amount of time before she composes her response.

**I asked you first.**

Greg fires back quickly, because really, he’s got the upper hand here and there’s no need for the pretense of waiting five minutes to respond.

**I meant to text my study partner, Randy. What about you?**

Okay, so he’s going to lie to her. Seems par for the course. Rebecca responds in kind.

**I was going to ask if you had ever been to a Bar Mitzvah?**

**I lived in West Covina my entire life and you were the first Jewish person I ever met there. What do you think?**

Rebecca can’t tell if he’s being hostile or if it’s just Greg’s natural state of sarcasm. 

**I think you’d probably loathe it.**

**I think you’re right, Bunch.**

She smiles fondly at the nickname and the feeling hits her so fiercely – _she’s missed him_. If nothing else, she misses having him as her friend. Greg had been privy to some of her worst behaviour, but he still liked her anyway, for the most part. Josh, for all of his incredible qualities, had always taken off running.

**Is Josh having fun?**

Her shoulders sag. Of course Greg knows. Sure, he avoids social media like the plague, but White Josh and Hector certainly don’t. They had to have warned him. Rebecca wonders idly if he punched a wall this time too. Then she remembers, _shit show_ , and decides most likely not. 

**Josh can have fun anywhere.**

The three dots appear, disappear and then re-appear. 

**I must have missed out on that gene.**

**Right there with you, Serrano.**

Rebecca wants to say more, because now there’s finally enough time and distance between them that maybe they could keep in touch, be pen pals or long-distance friends who don’t talk about their significant others. 

**I’m glad you’re happy, Rebecca.**

She stares at the text for the longest time. How does she even respond to that? Does she finally know what happy feels like? Does Greg? 

Eventually she gives up, simply responds with: **I’m glad you are too, Greg** , even though she has no idea if it’s true or not. 

Later, as she’s back in her childhood home, lying on the couch beside a snoring Josh, Rebecca tries to imagine if she would have been happier if it was Greg that she brought back to Scarsdale with her. She doesn’t think so, and she’ll never tell another soul, not even Paula, that she even entertained the idea. Rebecca knows she would have been miserable either way.

But she wouldn’t have minded so much if Greg saw her unhappy.


End file.
